nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
Will you come get her? She's trying to get the pizza guy into the bathtub.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
Sorry we're taking so long, this weed cake tastes amazing with Tabasco sauce on it.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
I knocked over his glass and he yelled "Oh no the boxed wine!" and slurped it off the coffee table. Then he showed me how to mix maple syrup, Jameson, and coffee. My family is better than your family.
The abomination is in progress. At least one barista side eyed me and the other has fear in her eyes
Randomize
