butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
My financial advisor filed my girlfriend's abortion under "investments" so my wife wouldn't find out
I remember now some guy came over and hit on me and poured peppermint schnapps and chocolate syrup in my mouth. Pretty sure he was dressed like Santa....
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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