The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
anal on a first date. tsk tsk.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I'd like to stay optimistic, but I have this nagging suspicion my penis is in for a disappointing holiday weekend.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
