I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
He doesn't need to speak English. He needs to speak sex.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
I just had a flash of memory of me asking all of the girls if they were on their periods. If they said yes I said it made us moon sisters.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I've made my dad a martini every night since I was 13.. I got this
Me and a 30 year old man are sitting in my bathtub in swimsuits drinking straight rum from the bottle. Don't tell me how fucked up your Christmas is.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
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