Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
I just used an app to identify a song that was playing in the background of a porno. May god bless your soul steve jobs.
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
Walk of shame. Stopped at an estate sale on the way back to the house. Old lady pulled a condom wrapper of the back of my hoodie. beat that
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
