i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
Stolen hampster on my tits. Don't tell me I don't know how to party.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
You thanked your mom for the gymnastic lessons so you could do a keg stand
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
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