i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
He fell and asked for a beer and a band-aid.
HE GOT FOURTEEN STICHES
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
Is it weird that the cop that arrested me called me twice to tell me that I left my ring at the police station
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I'm eating taquitos in the bathtub at 5:30 am. What a great end to the night
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize