Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
can we take a moment to remember my theory on 'your tongue is a snake that lives in your mouth' because we reached a whole new level of high
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
He's a freak. Not like "freak in the bed" freak but like "eats glue in the weekends" freak.
Randomize