Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I wanted lighthearted conversation about ordering bulk condoms and anal lube but he's depressed and talking about god hating him, ugh
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
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