Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
there were staples in my comforter. what kind of sex did we even have?
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
i keep replaying things i did last night. and remembering new things. and its a constant cycle of torture
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
TURNS OUT they were both cheating. Like the Gift of the Magi except for shitty people
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
Randomize
