i just saw a homeless guy running after a pigeon, catch it and put it in his jacket pocket. I'm not sure if the bird is now his pet or dinner!
Omg. Well, welcome to Oakland...
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
There are about 5 pictures of my dog taking a dump on my camera and 20 of Brandon taking one for "comparison" reasons.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
I have 3 vacation days left and I'm guarding them like a gay dragon on a pile of gold dildos molded after celebrities.
Smaug the FABULOUS
Did you wake up next to Karina?
So that's her name
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
He hit me with his bagpipe
Isnt that against the lesbian handbook?
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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