so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
I'll pick you up. Avoid slightly awkward no-we're-not-dating-but-I'm-still-screwing-your-son-after-2-years parental run-ins.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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