barbara walters just said penis...
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
No, we will not be going out tonight. We are trying to grow the toy donkey in whiskey rather than water. Serious fucking science. Have fun at the boring bar while we Bill Nye it up in this bitch.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I met my future husband in an elevator. Think Hispanic version of Dr. Bunsen Honeydew from the Muppets, but with eyes like Michael Fassbender.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
i feel like ive seen the light, but not in the nasty christian way. thats gross. say no to jesus, kids
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
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