I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
Coffee is gods way of saying go ahead, get absolutly trashed on weeknights, I got your back
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
we got plastered, then made lists of anything thats ever been in our vaginas
I know. Brad is upset because he was lower on the list than "that carrot stick"
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize
