Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
one of the service guys here said i licked ranch off your face lastnight
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
He's cheating on his wife, and he's judging me for eating McDonalds
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
Randomize
