My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
it's like the easy bake oven version of plastic surgery
Randomize
