why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She always acts like she's doing me a favor with a hand job. I've been giving myself hand jobs for almost 20 years.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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