Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I think I'm still a little drunk from Sunday Funday and I just changed for a date in my car. wish me luck.
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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