There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
6 more days and it'll be a year since i slept with him and never went home
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
he tried to have the "are we in a relationship" chat last night. I stuck my fingers in my ears, yelled lalalalalala very loudly at him and told him I would stop having sex with him if he ever tried that conversation again. bad person, or just being a realist?
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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