I'm drive I can fine osifer
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
Hey, you remember years ago when you told me you would give me a kidney?
Blacked out drunk in California and woke up somewhere in Arizona, I'm pretty sure I got here on foot
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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