She stuck a Big Gulp bend-y straw up his ass to see if he could handle anal.
Ew, and?!
Well he couldn't and the deal was he had to drink something using it afterwards.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
Woke up at 4:30am to my little brother shaking me. Apparently I fell asleep naked on my kitchen table waiting for the toaster to pop. 2 years of college completed and i still havent learned my drinking limit...
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
He ordered three small pizzas while I was giving him head.
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
No, I barely made it home last nite. Kept telling cab driver I live across the street from Susan Sarandon?? Thank god her coop addy is posted online.
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Having random cyber sex while watching to catch a predator just seems wrong.
Randomize
