she said she missed her period, but is going to six flags... think im safe?
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
Well we can add this to the list of 'where the hell did that bruise come from?'
Randomize
