sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Somehow I magically turned down a threesome last night. On my birthday. You're a horrible wingman.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I'm sorry you couldn't sneak away today. You're the only guy I'm fucking that I can talk with about the other guys I'm fucking, and I need some advice
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
You put me in such a good mood with that road head, I bought everyone at Hooters donuts.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
