how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
My professor just used the phrase "balls deep in your mind". My day is officially made.
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
Randomize
