we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
I lost count of how many people I peed on last night.
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
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He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
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The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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