scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
