whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
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On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
There's a time and a place for everything. Except for getting wasted at a work event, puking in the parking lot, and sleeping in your car overnight.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
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I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
Are you drunk texting me again or are you just being your regular stupid self?
yes
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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