Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
He's been dancing to the same Rob Thomas album in his room for almost 8 hours now. Please never, ever bring extacy over here again.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I am 100% planning on being drunk on Wednesday. This is America. Work or no work.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Randomize
