You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
if you are receiving this text, you are one of the people i hate
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
The preggo girl brought her pet chipmunk to class today. fyi.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
Because I can't get laid, I'm day-drinking and hunting squirrels in the backyard. You can take the girl out of Montana...
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
So what's today's forecast for the female rollercoaster you've been riding?
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I was just at home taking Vicodin for a week straight. Talk about a vacation.
I was on etsy and I'm like those boobs look way too familiar
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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