bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
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