I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
Considering last night's endeavors, I am going to hell 5 times over. 1 for puking on a hobo, 1 for laughing about it, and 3 for remembering it today and laughing about it sober
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have taken lazynest to a new level. I took a picture of the notes on the board instead of writing them. I win.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
Drunk in burger king. Having it our way. Free fries. M&m sundaes.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Just asphyxiate me and toss my corpse in the Ocean. It'll be easier than whatever the next four or eight years will bring.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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