Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Directions to your booty call: go down the part of Route 66 that has all the car dealerships, motels and bad decisions, go past the Christian college and turn left at the Children's Center.
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
The part where he comes over and ignores you isn't what makes me mad about that story... It's the fact that he ate your tacos, AND THEN proceeded to ignore you. That's cold hearted.
there is puke in my bra ... again
It was just another case of she fell in love I fell asleep.
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