I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
please stop taking shits in my toilet and leaving them there.
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
New Orleans is just like you. Dirty but beautiful and will always have a special place in my heart
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Randomize
