Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
I told her my hands were paint brushes and her vagina was my canvas
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
we found her on the beach half naked talking to a palm tree
Which half?
Randomize