The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
My bosses just told me they met their wives on one night stands. I'm stoked.
You have to come over we all bought drinking hats. Mine has a turtle on it. Side note: somehow someone got their hands on 50 candied apples and we need to eat them...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
You told my mom you were going to "Raw Dawg some randoms." That Drunk.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
So much rum. So many feels.
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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