i think my mom watched the whole time
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
Randomize
