maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I'm responsible for my client's overall well-being. Which is terrifying coming from someone that can't stop masturbating and eats leftover pizza just about everyday.
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
gave out my moms phone number instead of mine last night... thattttttttttttttt dunk.
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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