Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
The owner of this phone is no longer accepting texts from liars, assholes or married men. You figure out which one applies.
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um, would you be up for dick jousting? Stefanie is willing to pay 40 bucks.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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