what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
It's hot as dicks out. Lets get drunk on the roof and make pterodactyl sounds at people.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
how fucking stupid do you have to be to think I'm going to accept your friend request months after falling asleep during one night stand sex?
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
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