It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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