Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
Full disclosure. I fucked the fatty from work and shit is weird now.
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Dicks are not precious.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
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