We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
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