He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
wat bout pragnant strippers??
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bro, i just sang journey's "dont stop beleavin" at mcdonalds. and the guy was sooo impressed he gave us free food. God i love america
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
I thought I would take a shower to wake me up but now I'm naked wet and stoned laying on my bed instead of just stoned laying on my bed
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
She just invited me to drunkenly make out on the kitchen floor again.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
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