Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just woke up covered In blood, I have cuts all over my body, I can't find my clothes from last night, I'm still wasted, i'm pretty sure I have a sprained ankle, and the best part is, I have absolutely no recollection of what led to this. THAT'S why vodka is the greatest drink in the world.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Dude you has no fucking this poptart
What?
I dont know to explain this.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
he just kept texting even after we lit his shoelaces on fire. he just calmly walked into the pool... still texting.
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
Fuck this virus. We’re finally back on campus but the bars suck parties are banned sports are canceled we eat in our rooms and can’t fucking hangout with anyone. I’m tired of virtual classes and involuntary celibacy
OMG IKR! It’s not college unless we’re puking in a toilet wondering if we’re pregnant or just hungover!
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