never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It sounds miserable..I have to wear a dress and it's a cash bar?
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
Had the weirdest dream last night. If you're ever in Texas, do not come over with a 12 pack as a bribe and ask for a threeway between you, me, and my TA. I will take the beer though.
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Randomize