READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
Woke up in a pool of alcohol sweat. Probably could wring out my sheets and make a decent cocktail.
I feel like one of those toads that you lick to get high or find a prince.... cept when you lick me you find a drunk whore.
how the FUCK am I supposed to macarena while doubble fisting?
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
Look, as flattering as it is, I'm getting a little tired of being everyone's go-to girl for a threesome.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
Did you leave a mouse under my pillow again?
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