? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
don't look now, but that cross eyed girl is staring at you... and me.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
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