weddingsv make me drug and hornr
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Holy shit, I just successfully took and sent a boob pic AT MY DESK I have conquered an entire new level of skill.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
Randomize
