i left the bar a little after you and ended up flipping my car in the arbys drive thru
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
There is a clear recurring theme of me having sex in restrooms that really needs to stops
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
I love your family. Oh. And on a completely unrelated note, I know where we can steal a dog.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
This is my gift to your gina
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
