North Korea, Best Korea!
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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